Vote for Mr. Funk E. Dude
The Smell of Mastodon!
The Smell of Mastodon!
Mr. Funk E. Dude is the candidate Mastodon needs—a champion for boosting voices, standing up against hate, and ensuring that all children learn "The art of the fart" by age 12. With his bold vision and even bolder beard, he's ready to lead our community into a brighter, more inclusive future.
Mr. Funk E. Dude is committed to ensuring that almost every voice on Mastodon is heard. Unless you're an idiot. Then he'll probably just give you a cookie, pat you on the head, and point you in the direction of a library.
Hate has no home on Mastodon. Mr. Funk E. Dude pledges to take a firm stand against Nazis and hate speech, ensuring that Mastodon remains a safe and welcoming space for everyone. Under his leadership, ball kicking classes will be mandatory so that everyone can defend themselves against fascist assholes.
Every Mastodon instance is vital to the health of the network. Except that one instance. You know the one. Mr. Funk E. Dude will advocate for policies that support the sustainability and growth of instances large and small. He understands the unique challenges that instance admins face and is ready to provide the shit posts that they need.
Mr. Funk E. Dude isn't just a candidate; he's a movement. Join us in our mission to make Mastodon a better place for all. Together, we can boost, protect, and grow our community.
"Mr. Funk E. Dude has my vote! He's the leader Mastodon needs." - A Proud Instance Admin
"Mr. Dude once gave me a cookie that didn't track everywhere I went. It was just a chocolate chip cookie. He's got my vote." - Crazy man standing on the street corner with a sign.
Mark your calendars and make sure to cast your vote for Mr. Funk E. Dude. Let's keep Mastodon awesome!